Friday, 24 December 2010

A Car Crash and a Care Bear (in a pear tree)

I know what you're thinking: "Alana, what kind of crazy-ass events could lead to a blog title like this?!".  Well, there was both a car crash and a Care Bear and lots of other things like snow and breakfast. My partner in crime, Dr Guest, and I travelled over the horizon to a little place full of lakes and mountains and people I've known for between 24 and 27 years. Oh, apart from Edward the baby. He's only been around for eight months. Although technically he came from his mummy's tummy and I've known her for 24 years, so maybe I have known him all this time! Anyway, enough of me being weird.

So we started the weekend in a kick ass B&B called the Ditton Lodge in Papcastle (isn't Papcastle the most awesome name!!! Like a castle full of pap.). It got a rating of five Banana's (full marks, congratulations!!!). This was our fancy-pants room:
Super King with dual electric blanket - sweeeeeeeet! 

The view!

Our first mission was a drive to Ennerdale in the snow. Luckily, I've played Mario Kart an awful lot so the slippery roads were no match for me and my technical karting abilities. However, there was no way my little brum-brum was going to make it up the steep, icy, snowy, treacherous hill to Cathow Farm (the Marrs Family Residence). So we parked by a salt sand bin (excellent thinking Banana!) and waited for the magical 4x4 to whisk us up the hill.

Richard, the roughest-toughest-farmer in the West, arrived with a 'toot toot' and Mathew and I clambered in and up the hill we went, further and further still until we reached the magical Kingdom of Caring. Teehee, not really! Sadly, what actually happened was some stupid Audi driver came flying down the one track lane in the snow and couldn't stop in time so he hit us. Silly driver!!! Luckily for us Bed-time Bear was with us, I think he protected us because no one was hurt. If Tender-heart Bear had been there too I'll bet we would have crashed into candy floss. Clever Tender-heart Bear. 

The main injury Mathew sustained was an acute wounding of the pride when he got out of the car, slipped on the snow and fell on his bum. Oopsies! My leggings sustained a minor tear to the knee and thus they have now been demoted to pyjama-wear. Richard, because he is the roughest-toughest farmer in the West, sustained no injuries because he is a hard ass. His Land Rover, on the other hand, was badly injured. The wheel was crushed, the tyre punctured and the corner of the body was crumpled. Poor Mr Farm-hand 4x4. We salute you and your honorable service! His adversary, the Audi, was only one day old (ouch!) and his injuries were slightly more severe. I would have taken pictures but I'd have felt rather rude going "excuse me, can I just take a picture of your chewed up Audi? It's for my blog you see"; that would have registered as a seven on the richter scale of 'inappropriate social behaviour following a car crash'.

So, we used our little pins and walked the rest of the way to the farm. The whole hullaballo was totally worth it because we got to see this beautiful little fella!:
He is cuuuuuuuuute! That's Mammy Marrs
(aka 'Stephanie', former Currie and all round Domestic Goddess) on the right.

Because he is so beautiful I gave him his Christmas present early:
 "I love you Bedtime Bear."

"Daddy, you are hilarious!"

"Feed me Mammy Marrs!!!"

"Look how cute I can be."

Isn't he gorgeous?! Sadly, we had to tear ourselves away and off we ventured, down the snowy lane back to my pap-pap (aka: car). We then met up with one of my favourite families of all time: the Curries, comprising of my best buddy of twenty four years, Frances; Marshall Amp and Fender owner extraordinaire, Bill; chief casserole maker and my second mum, Cath; and the honorary Curries, Marc (daddy Wood) and Adam (baby Wood). During the course of the evening one of my favourite quotations of the day came from Bill, musical hero and all-round Scottish genius:

Mathew: Are you on Facebook, Bill?

Bill: I don't get Facebook. I'm not even interested in what I'm doing, let alone other people!

On that note...Peace Out Campers!!! And Merry Christmas Eve!!!

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